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FML Story – Moldy Grapes

TV Shows — Sat, 26 Sep 2009 06:47:45 +0000

FML Tale – Moldy Grapes

Today, I was trying to eat healthier, so I bought a fruit cup from the school cafeteria. It tasted kind of terrible, but I assumed it was just normal cafeteria food. But when I got to the bottom, I noticed a grape completely covered in blotchy blue mold. I had eaten the whole thing. FML

FML Story – Fear of Heights

TV Shows — Thu, 03 Sep 2009 19:56:22 +0000

FML Tale – Dread of Heights

Today, I was at an amusement park with my kids. When we were on the Ferris wheel, I learned my dread of heights. I hyperventilated, screamed from our seat “LET ME OUT! OH GOD LET ME OUT!!” . I also started crying hysterically. They stopped the ride for me to get off. I’m a 45 year ancient man. FML

FML Story – Weight Limit

TV Shows — Sat, 22 Aug 2009 04:53:40 +0000

FML Tale – Weight Limit

Today, I was on the elevator going up to a meeting, and the elevator was getting more and more crowded as we went up. After about ten people got on, they all agreed that I should get off the elevator because they thought me being on was exceeding the weight limit. FML

FML Story – Allergic to Sweat

TV Shows — Sat, 22 Aug 2009 04:52:52 +0000

FML Tale – Allergic to Sweat

Today, I went to the doctor to inquire about the rash I’ve been getting in my underarms, behind my knees and sometimes on my face. Turns out I’m allergic to sweat. I’m a varsity rugby coach, gym teacher, and I just shelled out a stack of cash to get a sauna and steam room installed in my house. FML

FML Story – Immunity

TV Shows — Tue, 18 Aug 2009 08:10:14 +0000

FML Tale – Immunity

Today, I found out that I’m immune to laughing gas and partially immune to novocaine while I was getting two teeth pulled. FML